So here I am crying and I think to myself, I need to blog.
Now most of you who know me know that I cry a lot-I cry in commercials, tv shows, movies, weddings, etc. But this isn't one of those happy cries or even crying because the girl didn't get the guy cries. I'm crying because I'm scared.
My being scared is justified. I'm freaking out okay? Every girl is allowed to have a freak out every now and then. I hate crying-it makes your face puffy and your nose run. However, maybe the crying will help me sleep and cast away the gloom on insomnia that's been hanging over my head.
My best friend phoned me today to tell me that she's got a fight on her hands with her health again. This girl has been through so much-you have no idea. She's been through hell and back with her health. Not that long ago, we thought we were going to lose her. Thankfully, by God's Grace, we didn't. But she's got another fight on her hands. So, I'm freaked out. And I think she already knows how everyone is doing.
There is one thing though now that she has that she didn't have then, and that's her husband, Neil. Oh, you don't know the relief I feel that he's there with her. It's so amazing to know that there's somebody there to watch over her all the time and to take care of her when she needs it. Believe me, it does make me feel so much better. I am so happy that she has such a wonderful man. He might be hard to get to know sometimes, but oh, I don't think I could have picked anyone for her that was half as good.
If I could take this from her, I would in a heartbeat. Part of me just wants to get angry at God, but I can't. I'm angry at the disease, not God.
I guess for now, it's one step at a time...