On This New Journey

Today, things are becoming clearer and I see the possibility of a light at the end of the tunnel.  Back in June, I applied to be a juvenile correctional officer with Justice Manitoba.  I was approved to do my testing and completed it July 13.  There were three different tests, and if  you failed any part of it, you were done.  One of the tests was an emotional intelligence test that was graded by psychologists in Ottawa.  Apparently, it's THE emotional intelligence test-it tells the employer how you handle stress, people, and how well you know yourself.  At the beginning of August, I found out I passed.  The next step was to tour and then you got the chance to interview at only ONE institution.  Today I toured one that is a youth correctional facility and I've chosen to interview there.  My goal is still to work with at-risk kids.  It's a minimum to maximum security correctional facility for youth age 12 to 20.  I'm not sure when the interview is, but I'm confident.  My goal is to move up within justice, either to get into the teaching end or some other end.  The training is 10 weeks, starting at the beginning of October.  The bad thing is that the training is ONLY being held in Winnipeg, which means a much bigger committment on my end.  I would have to figure out what to do with the dogs and everything-I've thought day boarding, but I would need about $400-$450 for that for the ten weeks.

I also met with EI who have approved me to take the training and continue paying me my EI.  They've also agreed to pay up to $125 a week in my travel expenses.  They won't cover the CPR, medical, or Class 4 license I need, but that in itself is a huge relief.  HUGE.  I would finish the course in the middle of December, and then hopefully see a paycheck in January sometime. 

I have been pushed to my limits financially-and I think I'm finally willing to admit to everybody that I had to claim bankrupcy a year and a half ago, and am still dealing with all of it.  That's the reason why I didn't have savings for the summer.  My payments were so huge that I couldn't save.  I'm due back in court in September, and I'm hoping for grace.  In court last time, I learned that my representatives were not looking out for me, and in fact, it was the judge who had way more compassion.  I have never been so broke.  I'm not even sure how I'll make it through everything, but I will.  I'm going to inquire about cashing in my pensions, which hopefully I can do that.

The fact is, I do feel more hope than I have in a long time.  I'm opening up to new ideas and the fact that I'm finally being so honest with people about what's happened, is not only humbling and even embarassing to some extent, but a relief.  I feel like a load has been lifted off of me.

So, this is me going forward and continuing this journey...