Have you ever wished that you could go back to a time where you didn't have to worry so much? I'd love to go back to the time when I didn't have to worry about bills and rent money and when life just made more sense. I'm just really struggling in all of this.
Going through the process of E.I. and form after form; well, it's just taking its toll. I know that I'm intelligent, but I think to myself that this shouldn't be happening to me. Well, it's a lie. Folks everywhere, like me, are going through rough times. I know I'm not the only one but life just hasn't ever offered me an easy way. I'm just not sure how much more I can take. Do I settle for less than I deserve? Or do I keep trudging my way through things trying to achieve my dreams?
Some are really good at preaching, but I just can't handle preaching right now from people who aren't in my shoes. Sometimes it's better for people just to be quiet. Part of me just thinks that I need to let completely go of everything and let it be...but for those of you who know me know that giving up complete control is extremely hard.
I want to believe that things are going to get better. I do, but I've lost my faith in people. I want to be able to completely 100% trust somebody. I'm tired of letting people in and being used and tossed around.
I'm sorry that this blog went from being fun and interesting to being so depressive. I'm just not in a good space right now.