Monday, November 15, 2010

Easy for People To Say

I think too often we judge people.  I think it's one thing to have your beliefs but quite another to enforce your beliefs on someone else who you know doesn't feel the same.

I have always hated being told what to do.  I grew up in a home that in some ways was quite controlled-not a lot of movement for freedom of expression...I think I broke my family soon of that though (or at least their attempts).  If somebody tells me to do something, I usually want to do the opposite.  I don't think of this as rebellion as such, but more along the lines of survival (when I was younger). 

Teaching at risk youth over the years has taught me one major thing:  you need to pick your battles.  I think too often we get careless with our words and say things we know the other person doesn't want to hear.  Some things aren't worth expressing.

It's hard though that when you recognize this and then some of the people who are closest to you don't.  People may think they are being helpful sometimes but unless they've walked in your own shoes, they have no idea.  They cannot get the struggle and coming up with "bubble" statements clearly shows their inability to get it.  And those statements, they hurt.  I'm quite sensitive, and I can't help but be offended. I think we as people need to look at how we treat each other...we make blanket statements to each other, not thinking about the consequences.  Personally it pushes me away, not just from the statement, but from the person. 

The fact is that once someone has made a statement and the other person has said that's not for me, I think the person needs to be respectful and drop the matter completely (possibly for the rest of one's life), unless the other person brings it up. You have to ask yourself, are making my beliefs a part of my friend's (or family member's) life worth pushing them away?

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