Psalm 23

In the midst of crying, I reached for my bible.  I simply opened it in two, an old habit that I used to do to start looking for a passage.  Simply by opening that book, I wasn't really surprised by what my eyes came upon.  It was a passage long used and much familiar to myself.  My great grandmother used to say it to me, and in times of trouble and grief, I always found comfort in it.  It was Psalm 23.

Psalm 23 (New International Version)

A psalm of David.

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,

he leads me beside quiet waters,

3 he restores my soul.

He guides me in paths of righteousness

for his name's sake.

4Even though I walk

through the valley of the shadow of death, [a]

I will fear no evil,

for you are with me;

your rod and your staff, 

they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil;

my cup overflows.

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me

all the days of my life,

and I will dwell in the house of the LORD

forever.

As angry as I feel, I couldn't help but be reminded of the fact that Christ, God's Son, died for us.  That God had to watch his son die.  Jesus' dying wasn't right-it wasn't right that he was persecuted and then chosen to die over some thief.  But it was right in the sense that it was God's plan because we needed a saviour.  So as much Amber's death isn't right-I know that I need to trust God about this. 
 
I'm no longer shaking or numb.  It's more than real.